I know I shouldn’t hold on but I just can’t see myself letting go of it. I know I won’t have you back, but I still am insisting of wanting you back. It’s difficult and I have no idea why I’m still holding on to it… It hurts me like shit and everyday I’m Just numbing myself by making myself very busy… Every time, whenever I feel like asking you out, I dare not do so, for fear of you rejecting me…. You even told me that I’m avoiding you, how can it be. More often than not, I’m always picturing both of us together, catching a movie and I always plan out things that I wanna say but I know that I won’t get the chance to say them out… I often picture both of you, and it always end up making me all teary and I will start crying… Why, why am I so foolish? Why can’t I let go when I know that you did ? You know, I often just wished that whatever you once told me will happen for once, will be true… I really wished that one day when I’m walking out of school, I will see a familiar looking guy from afar, and when I walk closer, I will see his familiar smile and figure… Then you will just walked me out of school, ignoring what others will think of us. then, we will head out for movie and dinner together, just having the time of our life. And you will send me home after that! How nice would that be, I’m sure that will brighten up the long and tiring day that I will have…
Oh wells, but I guess these are just what I’m hoping and dreaming for… I’m sure none of it will ever happen, there are just so many things I wanna say, but I guess I just didn’t had the courage to do so….
